Let me preface that I am never going to do a marathon again. The pain I felt from mile 19 on was excruciating. I knew it wasn't going to be easy, but a part of me is scared that I'll sign up for one of these things again and *forget* the pain.
I had butterflies all week before the race. I didn't think I was stressed about it... but I guess that I was subconsciously aware of the pain from my 2012 marathon. I had forgotten about it at the time I signed up.
So, I'll start with the expo. We got there Friday night at 6:40 pm. It was the perfect time!! A lot of people were heading out, so it wasn't too busy. Well, I guess you could say it wasn't busy:
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Chicago Marathon Expo. |
It was a very exciting expo and there were a lot of vendors, but I do have to say that I was disappointed with the marathon shirt. It's so boring and fits a little small. I purchased a shirt from Nike, and I'm sure they made such plain race shirts so we'd purchase more items.
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Loot from the Expo. |
We didn't spend too much time at the expo... we spent most of the day driving and sitting in Chicago traffic, so I was ready to get checked into the hotel and get some much needed rest.
On Saturday we did some touristy things. I just wanted to walk a bit to get the legs warmed up. We went to Nike Town where I bought two more Chicago Marathon shirts (those Nike people are pretty smart, making us spend more money), and went to the Bean. It was a beautiful day!
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Bean at Millennium Park. |
I actually got a good night sleep Saturday night. I set my alarm for 4:40 am so I could eat some food and rest a bit before the race start. I was feeling good and positive. My husband walked me to my gate, which was a little over a mile away from the hotel.
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Outside of the entry gates. |
We said our goodbyes and I walked into the gate. It was super crowded and really had no clue where I was going. I found the J corral and then got in line to use the restroom. The lines were super long. I waited in line until 7:40 am, and was no where close to the front. The corral gates were closing at 7:45 am, and I could use the restroom and start in the very back, or try to use a restroom during the race. I decided to stick it out and use a porta-potty on the course so I could start sooner. The first wave started at 7:30 am, and my wave started at 8:00 am. There were so many people!! I've never been in such a large race before!
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Race Start. Can you even see the start line?? |
I started running at 8:23 am... but it felt like I was waiting for eternity. I have been waiting for this moment all week. But mainly, I was ready to be done!! I was hoping for a miracle (i.e., no pain and a PR).
The race start was so exciting. I didn't have in my headphones. I really wanted to take it all in. We went through a tunnel and people were screaming with excitement. I saw one guy peeing in the tunnel and that made me mad. For one, I'm not able to do that (and I really had to go), and secondly, gross! My GPS was off, so I really had no clue about my pace. I knew I was going slow. I wanted to pick up the pace a bit, but it was so hard to pass people (esp. those running with friends), but then I thought that maybe this slower pace would help in the end (nope).
I found Josh around mile two and gave him a kiss and my long sleeve shirt.
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There I am! |
There were toilets after the first 5k. I knew the first porta-potties would be incredibly busy, but I was so darn uncomfortable that I really had no choice. If I wanted to enjoy myself, I knew I had to stop. There was a long line and I was there for about 6-7 minutes. I know, right! I should have just gone before the race (although I went many, many times before leaving the hotel).
I was having so much fun after that. We headed up towards Lincoln Park and I was feeling really strong. I was kind of amazed. I kept thinking to myself, that I would feel like this for the entire race (nope). Not really much else to say before I hit the wall, just that I was passing people right and left and that was kind of annoying, but I was really enjoying myself. I put in my headphones somewhere around the Lincoln Park area. I was in the zone.
We hit the half marathon mark in downtown Chicago. Then we headed out west towards the West Side and I was walking through every water break and running everything else. Then I thought to myself, maybe this is what I'll do until the finish. It was working for me.
Then mile 19 came and I hit the wall. I tried to run as much as I could, but I was so darn tired. My legs didn't want to move!! Then I would walk, and walking hurt more than running (if you can imagine that)!!! I was in a bad, bad place, but I was there with several other people. I saw many other people fighting their own demons. I kept thinking, we're all in this together!!!
I was in so much pain. I really wanted to sit, but that just wasn't an option. I kept moving and did a lot of walking, but I think I ran more. At least I was still passing people. I knew at that point I wasn't going to have a PR and I was a little pissed about that. Why did I train for this marathon and not even get a PR? Why did I do better two years ago when I had an injury?? What should I have done differently? This is what went through my mind those last 6 miles. We made the last turn back to downtown and I took out my headphones because I really needed to hear the spectators to get me to the finish. I heard lots of encouraging words, and I just wanted to cry. What's the point of doing a marathon when it's just shitty?? You hear about people dying at marathons (two were taken to the hospital yesterday. One is in critical condition.). Is it really worth it? I think my mind is still in a bad, bad place. As I lay here with ice on my legs...
I *finally* got to the finish line and I didn't want to stop running because I knew walking would be much much worse. One guy even commented, "she doesn't want to stop!". Truth is, I wanted to cry and get the hell out of there. They have everything so spread out so the finish line doesn't get congested (which is smart), so I ran up to the people giving away the medals and accepted my medal, almost in tears. But looking at this picture, I looked so happy!! Hello, you just finished a marathon. What an amazing accomplishment!!
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Done!!! |
And maybe that's why I love the marathon. It really shows what you can do... even through all of the unbearable pain, you can still finish.